Make it Quick, Satan

“Why do they always look like they are about to eat Coraline?”

Hello, Lovelies. How the hell are you?

Ahoy from this absurd hell, where time has all but slowed to a standstill and the award for most ridiculous superspreader event goes to Austria for a yodeling conference. If you think about it… all a Trump rally really is is a much less artful yodeling convention. High on a hill is a scary goat herd.

And then there’s our dear ex-president… yes, Obama does seem to be rather enjoying his new gig as needler-in-chief. What’s better is that he’s just so damn good at it… twisting the knife.

Still… has the state of constant disaster preparedness left you in a constant blender cycle of fight or flight? Are you eating your feelings? Are they all made of pie? You are not alone. That said, we may need to appeal to the baser powers to get us through these last days… Make it quick, satan. Make your move… Remind us of all of our scrappy ways.

The other day I had what can only be referred to as a New York conversation. I needed something from a woman on the other end of the line. Her voice was fast and low, she didn’t fuck around: “Here’s what you need to do,” she said… Ah, my maven, my answer, I thought. She didn’t over-explain shit like men here so often do. There weren’t too many words. I told her to stay safe and felt her slight telephonic smile as we hung up. I missed that. Ah, New York City where you always carry a knife in your purse… in case you encounter danger or a bagel.

Last night, a friend reminded me that if these are our the last four days before another civil war or some such crazy thing, we’ll remember them as the last BEFORE times so, we need to let go of certainty right now or it will make us nuts. Instead, he suggested we enjoy a little of what’s good…

Some things that are objectively good right now:

Queen’s Gambit… This generation’s Beautiful Mind

I am obsessed with these hypnotic Chinese gardening videos… this woman’s goddamned effortlessness is a wonder.

Seeing how different brains hear music…

A new genre-busting movie… Thorp… that will take you out of these last four days, and which I’m pretty sure Daniel Levy from Schitt’s Creek should get behind because there’s just a sweetness here that the world needs right now.

This incredible poetry wisdom of kids… (breath audibly departs)

Stay rad, lovelies and take care of each other. XOXO – GG

Apocalypse Now-ish?

Hi there, Lovelies. How the hell are you?

Soaringly anxious? Justifiably outraged? Feeling like we’re living in a Cormac McCarthy novel and in much need of levity? Maybe you feel like shouting, “NICE try, Coronavirus… I was already crazy and out of shape before you came along.” Perhaps you’re experiencing an inaugural epic WFH fail… and accidentally texted a colleague your entire household grocery list and told him to make sure to get tampons.

Alas, there are still some good things in the world…

Give author Sara Benincasa’s new Apple podcast, Well, This Isn’t Normal a listen.  Her book Agorafabulous!: Dispatches From My Bedroom is also a riotous, relatable gem for this new era we’ve entered.

WTIN

Speaking of eras, Dan Chiasson’s thoughtful meditation on our shifting sense of time during the Coronavirus gave this girl comfort as well.

You might also like Dr. Kathleen Smith’s fab newsletter The Anxious Overachiever… it’s crazy-practical and actionable. She’s my favorite stressed-out therapist these days.

If you need some funny… Dave Pell’s piece on McSweeney’s FAMOUS LINES OF POETRY REVISED FOR THE AGE OF CORONAVIRUS is such a chuckle.

Dave Pell.png

If you’re one of those folks who has to keep moving to stay sane but are now quietly panicking in the linen closet, this is a wonder of an online community: My Peak Challenge with a new Daily Social Distancing Workout.

Lastly, if you’re feeling a bit randy, check out this thoughtful piece by Elyse Martin on How a Book of Medieval Sex Tales Can Help us Through the Pandemic…

Ok, that’s what I got… Stay safe and stay home, Lovelies – xoxo – gg